Why me, why her - why me, why him - why us?
by betzen84
Summary: about a girl who lost her dad in the war - about a idiot falling in love.
1. Chapter 1

**Every light in the house is on.**

The light didn't look the same; it was not as bright as I remembered it to be. Standing there looking out the window I could just see how we used to run

around in granddad's well-kept yard. Well it used to be well kept not anymore though. Now it looked like there could be gremlins hiding down there. I looked

around the yard and in the edge of the woods I could just spot the tire swing where dad used to push me, not anymore though,

know he will never push me anymore, I know I may be too old to be pushed on a swing by my dad but it's the memories that count and the feelings that

comes with those memories. Used to that one word kept on repeating itself in my brain used to not anymore how I just hate those words.

tomorrow would be the last day, the day where my whole family or what's left of it will go to Seattle and follow the coffin back home or back to my

dad's childhood home, this will never be home to me, this will be a sad replacement of what used to be my home. There will be no dad coming in

the door there will be no smiles and laughs as I greet my dad when he comes home from deployment and I get to keep him near until they call

for him again.

My Dad LT. James Johnson, proud soldier, great man. My hero. He took care of me since my mother died of breast cancer when I was 5 these last

11 years it has just been us and my dad's parents, my grandparents but they died when I was 16 and since then the two of us stuck together like

glue. Know I need to find a way to hold myself together without him. my dad had just been send to Iraq to train the new troops in close combat he

had been gone less than a week when I got the message, we are very sorry to inform you that LT. Johnson died when a bomb landed in the training

facility. I don't remember the exact word use or the man who came with letter the only thing that is clear in my mind was that I was alone and that

I didn't know how to turn of the heater or if I even should turn of the heater, why was I even thinking about the stupid heater my dad is death and

all I think about is a stupid heater. Why am I so weird, why did he have to die, why I am alone, what I do, who it is I want all these answers from?

know I stand here in a room in my granddad's house in forks, I haven't been here since my mom was buried, my dad and my granddad had a

disagreement and I was told that I never would get to see my granddad again. But here I am looking out of the window out all over the town I was

told I never would see again, but I guess things change. Tomorrow we will follow my dad's coffin from Seattle airport to the family burial plot where

we will lay my dad to rest next to my mom. I think they would be happy to know that they get to spend the afterlife together again, I always felt

like they didn't have enough time together in this life so it makes me happy to think they will get all the time together in the afterlife. I couldn't help

but think about who would turn up to the funeral. Who would care enough about my dad to show up; maybe it would just be my granddad and me.

that would be awkward, he may very well be my only living relative but that doesn't mean I know him or that we can stand there and comfort each

other, but even if somebody comes the only one that would get comfort would be my granddad because to me they a just as much strangers as my

granddad is.

The next day I was up an about by the time my granddad was waking up, I think I scared him a little when he saw me standing in the kitchen

looking out over the yard. But he would never admit that. "Hi baby girl what are you doing standing there? I was just on my way to wake you up."

"Good morning granddad I just couldn't sleep I kept on thinking about the last time I saw my dad, I really didn't think it would be the last time."

I know sweetheart, sometimes the good lord just can't wait and calls good people home before we are ready for them to leave, it happened to your

mother, your grandmother and know your dad sometimes it's just the way life goes." I couldn't believe a word he said. How could he, how could he

think that way, how anybody could think that way. I got so mad that I just took my shoes and ran.

Half an hour later I was walking around the edge of the woods when I heard a noise but it was not just any noise it sounded like a screech but not a

very human screech. I looked around but when I didn't see anything I just decided that I should probably get home and talk about my feelings with

my granddad, my dad always said "when your first reaction tells you to run away, you must instead turn around and run there, because it's the

brave thing to do, and we Johnson's are brave." I always follow my dad's sayings because it was those sayings that made him the man he was and

it will be those sayings that make me the woman I am going to be.

**Just the way you are.**

The wolf pack had all gathered at Sam and Emily's house, all of them were sitting around and eating breakfast when Paul came in the kitchen looking around

pulling his hair. Emily "hi Paul sit down and have some food before your brothers eat it all. What's wrong, why are you pulling your hair, stop that".

Paul "I don't know, I really don't know, I can't seem to calm down but I'm not mad it just feel like I'm, like I'm supposed to do something or be somewhere else". Sam "do you feel a pull, have you meet anyone?"

Paul stopped moving around and stood swearing in to the wall. The others gave up trying to talk to him and just let him stay where he was. Paul could feel

the pack moving around him, he could hear what they said but he was just suddenly feeling so sad.

Paul left after a while and found himself wandering around the old cemetery. He had no idea what he was doing there put he felt a pull of some kind driving

him, pulling him to go there. He looked over the stone wall and could just barely make out to people he didn't know standing of to the side of a burial plot,

there was some other people standing around but no one he noticed standing nearly as close to the as those two, one of them was an elderly man he stood of

to the side the girl stood beside him holding the American flag, did this mean it was a soldier being buried, he didn't remember to have read anything about

it. Just like that there was a swift wind blowing and he saw the girl hair blowing in her face. Paul hurried along he didn't want them to think he was spying on

them or that he was standing there being creepy. When he was walking back to Emily's and inside the house, he found himself thinking and singing of a song.

_"Her hair, her hair, falls perfectly without her trying. She's so beautiful, and I tell her every day" _

All the guys could hear someone singing and ran in the living room where the only one standing there was Paul. Quil laughed "oh my god Paul did you turn

sissy on us, never thought I would see the day where you would come singing and looking happy at the same time." The other guys laughed and joked, but

Paul didn't care he couldn't find it in himself to be angry or mad. When Paul stopped to think about it, it even sounded strange to here himself think this way,

maybe he was coming down with something. "Hey Sam you jackass I thought you said we couldn't get sick, then why the hell am I singing some lame ass

tune?" Sam just stood there staring at Paul "Paul where were you just now?" "What the hell does that have to do with anything? Are you getting down with it

to?" Quil was looking Sam and Paul up and down with a shocked expression then he moved away from them with a look of disgust. "Ewe, why are you

standing there if you are contagious?" Sam felt like he should beat the dumb one with the dumber one of the two but right now it was a draw between the

two of them. "Paul don't you see what is happening? Don't you feel a connection between the weird stuff that's been happening to you?" Paul just stared at

Sam with his mouth hanging open, but then he started thinking," I was feeling a pull and it led me to the cemetery , then there was that weird song after I

saw the girl and the elderly man at the cemetery. Shit, Sam. Do you think what I am thinking?" "I don't know Paul it depends of what you are thinking"

Quil and the other guys stood of to the side and was taking in the conversation, then Quil blurted out "Shit, Sam you think it's a ghost pulling a prank on Paul

after he was at the cemetery?" Jacob slapped Quil in the back of the head while he shook his own head. Everyone else just started slapping their own

forehead. Paul didn't know what to feel after Quils dumbass comment in a way he wished it had been true because then he didn't have to come to terms with

the scary truth. Sam looked at Paul "you my friend are close to finding your imprint" the pack all dropped the food, the remote-control and Emily even

dropped the pot she was holding. Paul started shaking his head while muttering no like a stubborn teenager. Then faster than a vampire could run he was out

the door. He didn't even make it in to the woods before his body started to change its form.

Sam looked back at Emily and said "I think we need to help Paul as much as we can."


	2. as good as i once was

**As good as I once was**

Waking up to a new day, a day without my dad a day without hope and a day without anything to do I felt like a failure. I had already run

away from my granddad when I didn't like what he was saying. And it wasn't even noon yet. I had just stepped a foot in the kitchen when

my granddad yelled. "Breath gran, I'm back and I'm on my way, I was in the woods not Norway" granddad chuckled to himself. I started to

apologize when he cut me of "baby I need you to go to the store, we need eggs, milk and whatever you want to cook and eat because I'm

going to be away this evening, there is a poker tournament at the community center and I'm feeling lucky in more than one way" I just stood

there trying to keep my thoughts from going down exploring what he meant about getting lucky. "Okay, where are the car keys and did you

write a list or am I just supposed to fill the shopping cart?" I was very grateful to have a granddad that didn't expect apology from my earlier

behavior, but that still didn't mean I wanted to find out about him getting lucky… yuck…

I drove down the road of forks but there wasn't any place there was open I was just about to turn the car around when I noticed a road sign

by some trees La push, Oh might as well do some exploring while I'm at it. And I'm glad I did I hadn't even gotten 2 miles down the road

before there was a convenient store. Yes that meant I was going to get some dinner tonight. I parked the car and got in the store, it was a

small store but it had the most important items you know the stuff you would rather die than live without, toilet paper, shampoo, and food

items. I was just about to reach for a shopping cart when it got taken out right before me. There were two enormous guys beggaring in the

middle of the store. I went to the other side of the store afraid of what could happen if I got in the middle of their fight.

Brady and Collin sent out shopping for Emily. They were standing in the store arguing about which brand of milk to get. Brady wanted to get

the one Emily always bought but Collin saw the other one was on sale. Brady "Collin you cheepo asso, just buy the one she always buys that

way we don't have to get back if the other one was wrong and we bought that one." Collin looked kind of unsure "but Brady Sam and Emily

already spend too much money on feeding us." Brady just rolled his eyes and kept walking around the store, after walking a bit something

caught his eye, and what a something it was a cute little girl with a nice ass bend over besides the vegetable section trying to catch the

tomatoes she must have dropped. Brady walked over and stood as close to her as he could and got down on his knees and grabbed some of

the tomatoes and held them out in front of her.

After cursing myself and my clumsy behavior I bend over and started to pick up the tomatoes, just as I was reaching for the last one it was

held out right in front of me. I looked up, and then I stood face to chest with one of the arguing guys from earlier. "Hi, I'm Brady" I took the

tomato and placed it by the others in my bag. "Hi, I'm Amelia Johnston, thanks for your help. But I have to tell you it's not every day I walk

around throwing tomatoes at peoples feet" Brady laughed "ha I know that, sometimes you throw apples" I couldn't believe his response here

I was waiting to stand here and hear how he would be bitching and mooning about how I threw tomatoes after him and instead I get a witty

response. Then the other guy came running and stopped in front of us with a high-pitched whine "hi, I'm Collin" I was just about to introduce

me, when he whispered something to Brady. I just stood there waiting for them to finish talking so I could be on my way.

Collin whispered to Brady "Dude, you did not just imprint on that jerk off session waiting to happen." Then Brady whispered something to

Collin and they both smiled at each other and then they looked at me. "Nope didn't imprint, but I wish I did? Want to ask her if she would go

to Emily's with us? I'm still not giving up on making her my girlfriend u know not all of us is bound to imprint"

It kind of freaked me out how they could be so in sync with each other, but then I realized the must be a couple. "Amelia would you like to

join me and Collin at our friend's house? She makes the best muffins and after that we could take a walk down the beach?" I looked at the

guys but then I remembered my granddad waiting for me at home. "Sorry guys I have a place to be." I said bye and expected them to get

back to their own shopping but they just stopped and looked at me with their big sad puppy eyes. I couldn't take it, I wasn't the same as I

once was, and I wasn't as good as I once was. Why did they want me to join them anywhere didn't they know what a big hopeless cry baby I

was. I just ignored them, got up to the cash register paid and left the store.

As I walked home I couldn't think of a reason to why they would want me to join them, I mean I haven't exactly been nice to anyone since I

got here I mean just this morning I yelled at my granddad. Maybe they have some kind of save the world fetish whatever I don't give a

damn they could do their own little thing as long as they keep out of my way.

Brady looked at Collin and said "what the hell was her problem" Collin "dude do you think she heard what I said and that's the reason she got

mad and didn't want to join us? I mean look at us who in their right mind would say no to join us. You even told her about the muffins and

suggested a walk on the beach if that doesn't spell make out session I don't know what does". Brady "yeah you're right. I bet next time she

sees us she's going to regret she didn't take us up on our offer." Collin nodded and paid for the groceries. They waited until they got to the

edge of the forest before they took off their clothes and phased so they could run back to Emily's.

**I got a feeling**

Back at Emily's Paul was in a foul mood. Anytime any of them talked to him or even just looked at him they would only get a growl in

response. Even Jared his best friend from childhood didn't dare to disturb him. Just when all the wolves were beginning to relax and ignore

Paul there was a bang and Collin slammed the door to the house open. Paul just looked at the door and just that stare made Collin and Brady

cower. After Paul looked away Brady walked in the house and made his way to the kitchen, just as he was about to walk past Paul, Paul took

a deep breath and relaxed. There was a relaxing smell following Brady in to the kitchen. Paul didn't even think about following Brady in to the

kitchen before he was in the kitchen. It was like the most natural feeling in the world that made him follow Brady. Brady felt something move

behind him and smelt Paul there. Brady "what, what are do, do you want Paul?" Paul" nothing, can't a guy walk in to a kitchen without

wanting anything." Sam walked in to the kitchen expecting to find Brady in a headlock. He wasn't quite ready for what he found when he

entered the kitchen. There beside the counter was Paul on his knees sniffing, inhaling brays hand. Brady "Sam thank god you came, I don't

know what to do, I don't know what's wrong with Paul he's been like this since I came in to the house." Sam "Paul step away from Brady."

Paul led out a small growl. Sam alpha commanded Paul "Paul what are you doing, step away from Brady." Paul growled but still got off the

floor and stepped away from Brady. Brady took this as his chance and hurried away from Paul and the kitchen. Paul stood in a daze for a

couple of seconds before Sam took the chance to ask Paul why he was smelling Brady. Paul "I don't know why I did it Sam I think I might be

going crazy I mean what could ever make me sniff brays dirty hands." Sam looked at Paul's puzzled expression. Sam "Paul what did you feel

when Brady walked in" Paul " I felt relaxed, happy giddy… man I must really be going crazy I have never in my life used the expression giddy

I mean is so, so gay, girly take your pick" Sam "uhm I don't quite know why you would be this way. The only thing that would make me

react any way near how you reacted just know is Emily, but unless you imprinted on Brady I don't see any reason for you to react this way."

Paul "I did definitely not imprint on that bastard." Paul couldn't handle any more questions from Sam, so he did the only thing he knew how

to do. He ran, he ran out of the house blind with rage. Whatever it was that made him calm down earlier was passed he didn't even slow

down when he crossed ways with a freshly showered Brady.

Sam slowly followed Paul and stood in the doorway and looked the way Paul

disappeared to. Sam "Brady get in the kitchen I need to talk to you" Brady "does it have to be in the kitchen, that place gives me the creeps

after what happened earlier." Sam "yes we are going in there and I think it's a good place to have this talk maybe it will help you remember

what happened to make Paul react this way." Brady looked at his shoes and slowly made his way to the kitchen. Brady "fine Sam what, do

you want to talk about." Sam "what did you do when you left earlier?" Brady "I phased, went to the store with Collin, bought the stuff on

Emily's shopping list, phased and got harassed by Paul." Sam "you didn't do anything else, you didn't eat anything, do any drugs or stuff like

that?" Brady "no nothing I didn't do anything, ask Collin." Sam "no, that won't be necessary; we will just have to watch over Paul."


End file.
